The first step in developing an essay is to formulate a strong, clear thesis. A thesis is the statement in which the writer takes a position on an issue. A thesis has the following traits: is debatable, can be supported with evidence, is a clearly stated fact, and is not based on personal opinion. I have to try to shape my thesis, so it can become an expression of my own point of view.
WORDINESS
Editing for wordiness:
- Look for unnecessary or redundant words. > Her constant and continual use of vulgar expressions with obscene meanings indicated to her pre-elementary supervisory group that she was rather deficient in terms of her ability to interact in an efficient manner with peers in her potential interaction group. > Her constant use of four-letter words told the day-care workers she n ight have trouble getting along with other four-year olds.
- Take out empty words - words like aspect or factor, definitely or very
- Replace wordy phrases with a single word. Instead of because of the fact that, try because.
- Reconsider any sentences that begin with it is or there is/are.
- Simplify sentence structure by using strong verbs and using the active voice. > In Gower's research, it was found that pythons often dwell in trees. > Gower found that pythons often dwell in trees.
Examples from my essay:
- The shimmering lights are such a staggering view at night.
- The shimmering lights are staggering.
- Eye-catching scenery, a scenic elevator
- Eye-catching scenery, a glass elevator
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